“Money is only a tool. It will take you wherever you wish, but it will not replace you as the driver.” Ayn Rand
Most of how we act with and think about money is unconscious. Our limiting beliefs and money blocks have been learnt, unconsciously, from an early age. As kids we tend to pick up on the words, actions and unspoken tensions from our parents or caregivers.
How often as a child did you hear:
· They must be made of money
· Money doesn’t grow on trees
· Money is the root of all evil
· That spending money on yourself is frivolous
· I’m not made of money
· We can’t afford it
· You can’t make money honestly
· …..Insert your own family saying here!
Maybe in your family money was a way Dad controlled Mum: just giving her enough for the “housekeeping”. Maybe there never was quite enough and your parents fought about it. Perhaps you were made to feel bad for “costing” too much. Or made to keep secrets: “don’t tell Dad we bought x, y, z”
Were you told to get an education so you could get a “good” job? Were you discouraged from being a dreamer, writer, artist because it “will never pay the bills”? This is really common from parents/grandparents that lived through war years (naturally).
For some, money has an evil side: whenever there was some extra cash it was spent on alcohol or drugs.
Or on the flipside… was money just never discussed in your house? You were blissfully completely unaware of it and your needs just got met without you ever giving thought to how.
However it was in your family, it is certain that we all carry the beliefs around money that we learnt from our families. This is not said to attach “blame” to anyone, but rather to bring an awareness to why we are how we are with money
Money coaching is a blend of behavioural finance and cognitive psychology. The goal is to balance out the rational and logical part of your brain (left brain), with the emotional and reactive side (right brain). Although we might understand money logically, most of our financial decisions and behaviours tend to be made with the emotional right brain.
We start the process by learning what our money beliefs actually are (honestly who has ever even pondered this question), then figuring out where they came from. We learn what money type you are:
· Innocent (head in the sand)
· Victim (it’s always someone else’s fault you have no money?)
· Martyr (always doing without… sigh….)
· Fool (easy come easy go.)
· Tyrant (using money to manipulate and control others)
· The Creator/Artist (the myth of the struggling artist)
· The Warrior (generally pretty successful.)
· The Magician (can transform and manifest their own reality).
Once you know where your money mindset came from and your money type, then the work begins to transform to a balanced money mindset.
The end result is you feeling empowered in managing your finances. You get to redefine success and what it means to you. Most importantly you will develop mindful money practices so your financial decisions align with your values.
This is just a quick run down of the process. Feel free to reach out if you want to know more. I’m always up for a chat!