“Money is only a tool. It will take you wherever you wish, but it will not replace you as the driver.” Ayn Rand

Photo by Boston Public Library on Unsplash

Most of how we act with and think about money is unconscious. Our limiting beliefs and money blocks have been learnt, unconsciously, from an early age. As kids, we tend to pick up on the words, actions and unspoken tensions from our parents or caregivers.

How often as a child did you hear:

· They must be made of money

· Money doesn’t grow on trees

· Money is the root of all evil

· That spending money on yourself is frivolous

· I’m not made of money

· We can’t afford it

· You can’t make money honestly

· …..Insert your own family saying here!

Maybe in your family money was a way Dad controlled Mum: just giving her enough for the “housekeeping”. Maybe there never was quite enough and your parents fought about it.

Perhaps you were made to feel bad for “costing” too much. Or made to keep secrets: “don’t tell Dad we bought x, y, z, it’s our little secret.”

Were you told to get an education so you could get a “good” job?

Discouraged from being a dreamer, writer, artist because it “will never pay the bills”? This is really common from parents/grandparents that lived through war years (naturally).

For some, money has an evil side: whenever there was some extra cash it was spent on alcohol or drugs.

Or on the flipside… was money just never discussed in your house? You were blissfully completely unaware of it and your needs just got met without you ever giving thought to how.

However it was in your family, it is certain that we all carry the beliefs around money that we learnt from our families. This is not said to attach “blame” to anyone, but rather to bring awareness to why we are how we are with money

Money coaching is a blend of behavioural finance and cognitive psychology. The goal is to balance out the rational and logical part of your brain (left brain), with the emotional and reactive side (right brain). Although we might understand money logically, most of our financial decisions and behaviours tend to be made with the emotional right brain.

You will identify as Innocent with money if you are easily overwhelmed by financial information and rely heavily on the advice of others. You appear to be carefree but inside you are fearful or anxious and you may avoid making financial decisions. Your secret wish to be rescued; to have someone else sort it out for you.

We’ve probably all played the Victim at times, but if this role spills into your finances you will find it hard to ever get ahead. You will know you are playing the victim if you are are the type that has a litany of excuses for why things have gone wrong and they are never your fault as other people always betray you.

The Martyr (alas I know this one well…) will always take care of everyone else first and often neglect their own wellbeing. Many people do this without being a martyr, however, the real martyr often doesn’t let go of what they have given and feel let down when people don’t recognise their sacrifices. (It’s taken me 50 years to realise that people aren’t mind readers and if I need something from them I need to ask…. who would have thought!)

You know the saying “ A Fool and his money are soon parted.” A fool lives completely in the moment and is unattached to future outcomes. They always land on their feet and easily attract money only to be overly generous and lose it just as easily.

Ironically, the Tyrant is often held up in popular culture as that which we should aspire to. They are usually financially successful, however, often use their money to bully and manipulate others. They may be outwardly successful but struggle internally with self-worth and feelings of not being enough…. the successful, materialistic facade is often just bluff and bluster.

The Creator/Artist is usually on a spiritual or artistic path and often find trouble living in the material world. A love/hate relationship with money is born of the need to have money to get by whilst often despising its existence. They often fear not being authentic or true to their art if they put a value on money.

Just like in the movies, a Warrior is focused, decisive, confident and in control. They are adept with money and rely on their research, instincts and resources to guide their decision making. Sometimes, however, they need to remember what is truly important to them or they get swept away in the “doing”. We all have some Warrior in us or we would never get anything done in the day, just not all of us use our Warrior when making financial decisions.

The ideal money type is the Magician. Wise, loving, fluid and balanced, they can transform and manifest their own financial reality. They embrace their inner spirituality, knowing their power comes from within, and have found peace in the material world.

Once you know where your money story came from and your money type, then you can work to transform into a balanced, healthy money mindset. You need to make the unconscious conscious before you can make any progress in changing how things are right now.

The end result is you feeling empowered in managing your finances.

What’s your money story? Start with simply journaling your earliest memories of money and see if the patterns fit with one of the money types. Delve into the feelings you have when you consider your money memories. Do you still have these same feelings now around money?

Next, give thought to how you might change this to become more mindful in how you manage money. For an innocent, it might be as simple as doing some reading on basic financial literacy to upskill yourself. For the fool, maybe you can give time or experience instead of money.

If you take the time to reflect on your relationship with money it is certain that you will learn something about yourself in process.

To find out more about your money type, take the quiz on the website.

Note: the concept of the 8 Money Types was developed by Deborah Price, Money Coaching Guru and Author of Money Magic.